"Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand." 
-Proverbs 19:21

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all
your ways acknowldge Him and He will make your paths straight."  -Proverbs 3:5-6

"And your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, “This is the way,
walk in it,” when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left."
-Isaiah 30:21

In the years leading up to the long anticipated day of graduating from high school and finally heading off to
college, I went through numerous life plans.  Originally, I was headed for
physical therapy.  I was excited and thought it would be great.  Once I decided,
however, that I didn't want to go to PT school, I decided on athletic training
as the closest alternative, and was ready to jump in there.  After further
consideration, I realized that nursing would be more practical and give me more
options and job opportunities.  So nursing it was.  I applied very early on and
was accepted to the Clemson nursing program.  About a week before submitting my
USC application, I had what I called my "mid-life crisis."  I decided that I was
going to change my major I was applying for from nursing to something in a
non-science field.  I had begun to feel that God was really changing my mind and
heart about what I felt that I was gifted at, and that I had writing and
communication skills that I should not put to waste.  Not to mention the fact
that I was enjoying science and math less and less every year.  

So, I entered USC as a public relations major. A year before I didn't even know what public relations was.  Only a couple months after beginning college, at the Navigators fall conference, God began to
lay on my heart the calling to something else.  The problem was, I didn't know
what that something was.  All I knew was that God was completely changing my
life plans.  But strangely, I was ok with it.  On the car ride home from the
conference, I did a lot of thinking and praying.  Even though I had suddenly, in
one weekend, decided to completely change my career path to something that I did
not yet know what it would be, I had more peace about things than I ever had
before.  I was learning to put my complete trust in God's plan rather than my
own, and realized that he would continue to show me what I needed to know, when
I needed to know it.  I began to realize that there may be a reason that Psalm
119:105 is worded the way it is: "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my
path."  This verse does not say that God will illuminate the entirety of your
path.  It simply says that God's word is a lamp for your feet--this implies that
the majority of the path may remain shrouded in darkness, but that the place
where you need to walk will be illuminated.  Similarly, a line in the song "His
Love Can Never Fail" reads, "I may not know the way to go but oh I know my
Guide."  If we are diving deeper into our knowledge of God, that is what will
guide us in our lives and show us the paths to take.  

So, I came back to school knowing that I would change my major, but not yet knowing what I would change it to.  All I knew was that God had a bigger plan for my life than I had for myself, and I was ready to
walk in it.  Throughout that semester, I went through many different ideas of
how to get where I wanted to go, but I knew that ultimately, God was calling me
into ministry--specifically youth counseling.  

Along the way, however, God brought Jared, who is heading into pastoral ministries, into my life first as my boyfriend, and then as my fiance.  God continued to show me the opportunities that were before
me.  Finally, I realized that my time at USC was coming to a close, and that
what I needed was elsewhere.  So I began the application process to Columbia
International University, and, Lord willing, will be beginning there in the fall
to receive a Bible degree and be able to focus on youth
ministry.

I'll be honest--I did not see any of this coming.  If someone had told me that I would be married at the end of my first year of college, that I would be enrolling at a Christian college, and
that I would be preparing to be a pastor's wife, I would have either laughed, or
just quit right on the spot.  While I was never opposed to marrying young, I
wasn't expecting it to be this young.  I also never wanted to go to a Christian
college.  I had some legitimate and some not so legitimate reasons, but I always
saw myself being at a large, public university.  And, the most important, I was
NEVER going to be a pastor's wife.  I had decided it.  My mom always made
comments about me finding a boy who was going to seminary, but I fought it with
all I had.  That was not the life I wanted, because honestly, I was scared to
death to be under that much scrutiny.  So, I was determined to go to a large
university, planning to marry at a typical age, and to marry a doctor or a
lawyer or something that was not a pastor.  My goal was to live a normal life,
simply blending in with everyone else.

Well...today, I am preparing to be married 5 days after turning 19, I am transferring to a Christian school with
about 600 undergrad students, and I am marrying a man who is planning to become
a pastor.  And I have to say, I am so incredibly happy that my plans were not
God's plans.  I have finally begun to understand the attitude that I believe one
should have when making plans.  Living in a way that is completely dependent on
God, and always going back to His Word to give light to your path.  While the
plans I am walking in are not what I had planned, I have never felt such peace
as I do right now.  Sometimes I'm scared.  Sometimes I wonder if I'm right.  But
what I can rest in knowing that God is always right.  And his plans cannot be
thwarted.  So my job is to simply dedicate myself to my guide, and continue to
take one step at a time in the light that His Word casts on my path.  And I can
look back at everywhere that I have been and know that it was what brought me to
where I am today.  Even though I seemed to fly through numerous plans, never
seeming to settle anywhere, God had a plan He was bringing about through it all.
  I know that everything that happens, God works for my good (Romans 8:28).  So
even when you do not know where you're going, where God is taking you, or even
when it seems that your life plans are changing daily, you can rest in the
knowledge and assurance that there is a plan.  There is a divine method to God's
seeming madness in each of our lives.  And we can devote ourselves to knowing
our guide more and more every day, and through that, walking in the plans He has
for us.

In the wise words of Steve Carell in Dan in Real Life: "Instead of telling our young people to make plans, we should tell them to plan to be surprised."

"And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also

rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces
perseverance;
perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does
not disappoint us,
because God has poured out his love into our hearts by
the Holy Spirit, whom he
has given us." -Romans 5:2-5

Most of us don't like to suffer.  I know I don't.  While this has been amplified by the
emergence of the American Dream, I believe that it is inherent in human nature. 
We wish to avoid suffering, and keep the ones we love from suffering.  A
"successful life" is often thought of as one in which a person has a lucrative
job, a nice house, a picture perfect family, and no sufferings of any kind.  We
want to get through our life unscathed, avoiding all possible harm. 

I believe, however, that at numerous points in the Bible, this ideology is
challenged.  In the verse mentioned above, Paul actually says that he rejoices
in his sufferings.  Looking at the life of Paul, there are obvious and painful
sufferings that he undergeos, the most obvious of these being thrown in prison
on numerous occasions.  He is questioned and punished, being ordered to cease
from preaching the gospel.  

These particular sufferings that Paul underwent are, I would think, unknown to those living in America. 
Thanks be to God that we do not (yet) have a government that has come to
throwing people in prison for the gospel.  But in reality, would it really be a
bad thing?  I pray that I nor any of my loved ones would ever have to undergo
this type of treatment, but the fact is, perhaps that should not be my prayer. 
This verse in Romans informs us that it is sufferings that produce perseverance,
which leads to character, which in turn, leads to hope.  Should I then, instead
of praying that God would keep me from suffering, pray that God would order my
life in a way that would produce perseverance, leading to character, and
ultimately leading to the hope that will not disappoint me?  I would venture to
say that Jesus is not concerned with us living a happy life.  No, Jesus wants us
to live a joyful life--but that joy is found in our hope in the glory of God,
not by our material successes on earth (2 Corinthians
4:18).

While I can't say this from experience, I firmly believe that the hardest time to ever believe this verse is
when it comes to your children.  From what I can imagine and what I have seen
and heard, no parent would ever wish suffering upon their children.  Their job
is to protect their children, putting their lives above their own.  That is an
admirable thing, and I cannot wait to experience the joys of parenting.  I
believe, however, that this verse cannot be suspended when it comes to
parenting.  As foreign and painful as it sounds, I believe that a parents job is
to pray that God would produce perseverence, character, and hope to grow in
their children, whatever the costs.  I realize that I am not speaking out of
experience, and perhaps if parents read this, they may dismiss me as speaking
about things that I don't know.  But I am trying to apply the meaning of this
verse to one of the most important and influential areas of life.  And I pray
that when I get to that point in life, God will give me the strength to live by
this.

I am not, however, only speaking about parenting.  This concept applies to everyone.  Our aim in helping each other as fellow Christians is to stand by their side, praying that God would produce
perseverance, character, and hope in them.  We rejoice with those who rejoice,
and mourn with those who mourn.  But ultimately, we give glory to God in all
situations.  And when we see our fellow Christians walking through struggles,
rather than comparing ourselves to them, being thankfully that we are not in
that situation, passing judgment on them, or even just feeling sorry for them,
we should instead see it as an opportunity for God's glory to shine through.  As
is seen in John 9, in the healing of the man born blind, when Jesus' disciples
asked him whether the man's blindness resulted from his sin or his parents,
Jesus replied, "Neither this man nor his parents sinned, but this happened so
that the work of God might be displayed in his life" (v. 3).  Our life is a
stage in which to put God's glory on display.  This will look different in
different people's lives.  But the end result is always the same--if our lives
show God's glory, show his ultimate provision and care, and shout out that He is
our creator and Lord, then our lives are counted a
success.

As Jared and I begin to step out into the future into a somewhat unsure situation, we can rest in this verse.  Not to say that we are not planning, or that we are throwing all logic and thinking out the window,
but we realize that "The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes
his steps" (Proverbs 16:9).  So it is not so much that we are making plans, but
we are seeking God's plan. For "Unless the LORD builds the house, those who
build it labor in vain" (Psalm 127:1).  The question is not "will we succeed" or
"will we fail".  For what is success or failure?  The question is, is God
working in us perseverence, character, and hope?  Will our life ultimately give
all the glory to God, not ourselves?  These are the marks of a successful life. 
Our success does not come from the amount of money we have, the size of our
house, or the prestige of our job.  Our success comes when our lives are a
reflection of the glory of our great God.